Monday Musing

There have been a lot of deaths in our family (ies) lately. February alone saw three.

Even though I know, pets and other animals are not the same as humans; they can get under your skin and become a part of your family.

We had a beautiful cat show up at our house Thursday. It curled up in a soft chair we have outside and seemed to be chilling. We knew something was wrong though because it barely moved when we passed it by. I prayed mightily for the poor thing.

This cat did not become a part of our family. I noticed on Friday it seemed to be weakening and put some food out for it. Nevertheless, it passed away.

I have had so many struggles lately, and the cat seemed to me to be a symbol of all that’s been happening. In addition, when it died, I cried buckets. I am even now, as I write this, and I didn’t even know the cat.

There is a medicine I have been taking for close to 10 years. Originally, the prescription was for PTSD, depression and anxiety.  As time went on and I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia and a myriad of other physical maladies, it was an antidote for those, too.

I noticed, however, that I have been having a lot of weird, strange and bothersome (translated painful) symptoms-all random and without logic.

I decided to start investigating the medicine.

WOW, double, triple and higher WOW.

This drug is insidious. There have been NO trials on long-term effects. The manufacturer even lied about parts of the minuscule, virtually non-existent trial studies. Still the FDA approved it for consumption.

Now that it has been on the market for 10 +/- years, people are discovering more and more disconcerting and unsettling information. In fact, one forum I found had several Drs’ comments and without fail, they said this was a sinister, ominous and evil drug.

The really bad part is the withdrawal-it causes psychosis, severe depression, severe pain and lots and lots of other symptoms with no way to alleviate or mitigate them. So, guess what? I came off and brother what a pain-literally and figuratively.

Instantly, I started having horrible, horrible symptoms and MAJOR depression manifestations.

So, the poor cat dying was sort of the last straw. It didn’t help that just before that I received a copy of a DVD memorial of my Dad—I picked a bad time to quit!

I am having an extremely terrible time. I want to scream, hit things and break something. I am trying HARD not to let things get the best of me.

So, dear friends (and a few laughing enemies!) I am going to pour myself into my blog-get ready for a real, raw, random and hilarious ride.

Scream

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